food for fish

Well after last nights little melt down (which is happening pretty regularly about once a month now), I cried out to God to just take it. Boy did I cry, I was sobbing for at least an hour, I simply can not do anything here without him. If I really want to be a part of people’s lives here, I have to give up Seattle, I have to give up the wonderful fellowship I had back home, and focus on HERE. I need to always be praying to God, and always be giving it to him. I can’t hold onto home or people from home any longer, God put me here, if I don’t get any fellowship in terms of with people, then I’ll get it with God, and that is the best kind. After I truly confessed all this to God, I felt so clean and good inside. I feel I have gone one more step; one more dot has been connected. Thank you God! I feel slightly different today, it’s a good change. Thanks for praying, and thanks for just listening to my struggles. When you feel like your in the desert, don't just "tell" God but cry out to him, there is something cleansing and releasing about crying.

This is just another day to die again.