food for fish

So, the post below was not the most encouraging thing to write about, and it goes completely against my recent discovery of problem solving. I’ve realized that this is just the same as any other issue I’ve ever had in life. Instead of clinging to the problem, and focusing on it, and just dwelling on it, I need to turn my focus to God. I need to turn my focus to really creating relationships with people here. I have no excuses, except laziness, and some fear too.

I know I’m not cut out for full time missionary work. I believe I’m really more of a discipler than I am an evangelizer. I am much better at answering questions about someone’s current state of faith, than I am at leading someone to Jesus. I am much better at having conversations about God with other Christians, than I am with someone who doesn’t know God. Evangelizing is just not one of my gifts, I am very appreciative of people who can do those things, who can lead people to the point where they can make the choice to have Jesus be the Lord of their life, but don’t expect me to, except by the Holy Spirit.

I am not someone who hides their feelings (anymore), I have no problem wearing my heart on my sleeve (er, blog). Believe me, it is guarded though, I don’t get hurt too easily (anymore), I understand when people want me to learn something, I understand when God is stretching me, and I don’t get defensive over things anymore. I want to be someone anyone can talk to, I enjoy just listening, and I enjoy just being a friend… I truly believe that if someone lives a life for Christ, then just the love of God will draw people to that person, and ultimately to Christ.

Lord Jesus,

Expand my mind, change my attitude, make me unsatisfied with where I am. I do not want to be silent anymore; I will not be quiet anymore. Lord, the cry of my heart is to know you best. Help me to be a part of the Polish culture, not an American anomaly. I ask for you to make me sensitive to the needs of people here, to be a servant to them, make me less than them. Lord I thank you for Joanna, for having her come upon this little blog, and for giving her the words I needed to hear. Thank you for using people such as her in my life, and keep my heart open to hearing your words. I’ve always said I was here to understand them, but I never did anything, which is foolish, I must work to make it happen. I have lots to do, help me learn the language, help me become something different. Holy Spirit take control.

In Jesus name, make it so, Amen.

PS. On the sidebar (at left) under "Zakopane, Poland Church Plant Info" I've added links to a Zakopane webcam, and my own webcam.