If there is one thing that bugs me more than anything it is a person not being real. Thus, I am really bugged, because it seems most people do not know what is to be real. Being real means taking responsibility for your own actions, sometimes it even means taking responsibility of something that was not yours in order to help another. A real person will be honest about his or her emotions and will not hide them or let them stew until they can only explode. Being open and honest is more than just speaking your mind, it is knowing what to say and how to say it so it edifies others; to honestly love someone, you see their need and you show them the way to fulfill it.
The worst part about this "being real" deal is that when I sense someone not being real with me I just don't want to even really know the person. I know this is hypocritical to my own thoughts, but really, who wants to befriend someone who hides what they are feeling, who says one thing but does another? Being a peacemaker (which most Christians are good at playing that role) is not being real; it is simply trying to make the emotions go away. Only once the emotional needs are met and healed will peace ever prevail.
Thankfully I have a handful of friends are unreal because they are so real with me and with others. They have no problem letting me know when I am out of line, they are not afraid of confrontation, this is real love, this is God's kinds of love. Unless we can confront reality, how will we ever be able to know love? If saw someone who was about to drive off the end of a bridge into a river 40 or more feet below I would warn them, right? Well I see people all the time doing that very thing with their lives, and I see even more people say, "Well it doesn't effect me, they can do what they want, it isn't hurting anyone". No, it is not right and I will not let it happen anymore, at least I will warn them, after that is there choice. Be real.