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Wednesday, May 21, 2003

Last night I was with an awesome group of friends worshipping, talking, praying, having fun. In the middle of worship I realized something is happening, I'm hitting some kind of plateau, and I'm not really satisfied with it. I don't want to stop growing, yet I find myself not moving forward, and not really doing much about it. I'm getting really tired of being in this holding pattern; I have no patience for just sitting still and waiting; yet another sign of God teaching me to be patient.

I guess I should relate my life to a video game, when I'm playing any kind of video game (which I'm not a big video game player, but I do play at times) I like to look around, find all the secrets, get the most out of the gaming experience. But when it comes to my life I want to skip all that stuff and just move on, get it over with. Why I have this attitude with video games and not myself I have no idea. I like detail, but I'm not motivated to figure it out in my life unless it's at the last minute.

For we know that all creation has been groaning as in the pains of childbirth right up to the present time. And even we Christians, although we have the Holy Spirit within us as a foretaste of future glory, also groan to be released from pain and suffering. We, too, wait anxiously for that day when God will give us our full rights as his children, including the new bodies he has promised us. Now that we are saved, we eagerly look forward to this freedom. For if you already have something, you don't need to hope for it. [Romans 8 22-24]