food for fish

I'm feeling particularly good tonight. I had a regular Thursday routine but it was good. First I woke up at the God awful time of 6:00am, but got out of bed at 6:45, 15 min before I was to be at work, which is a 20 min drive. But at least I got to work closer to the start time rather than the end time.

All day at work, I was tired, CRU was incredible last night but as usual we stayed up late, I love hanging out with all those people, it's so uplifting. As I was at work, I tried to remember to do everything to honor God, but I realize I am so human, it is so hard to be cheerful at everything you do, especially when you��re tired. But when I am unusually polite and patient with someone, it is so worth it! Because I��m the youngest person at my place of work, a lot of times I feel under appreciated, this is that selfish thing in me telling me I'm worth more, but in all reality none of that matters, that is gratifying. I still get upset over it, I want to be recognized, but I know if I truly work for the LORD I will be recognized, where it counts.

I had a really boring, semi-informative meeting today during work, the speaker was so passionate about his job, I kept thinking, wow, this guy really enjoys his job... thing is, he does almost the same thing I do, except he's thirty something and has even more work to do. Then I realized why I'm so sick of my job, I'm bored to death, I'm so bored I don't want to do the little things, so I don't. This in turn makes people think I'm unreliable, which I guess I am to a certain extent. I want to be a person of integrity, but it is so hard when I really hate doing what I��m doing, I'm not learning much right now, I just want to learn.

It was really sad to hear that Mr. Rogers died, that was a serious wake up call for me. Mr. Rogers was an intergral part of my childhood, this was truly a sad day. A moment of space to honor him and his ministry...




So, the rest of the day was blah, I missed my lunch because the meeting went forever, and I missed my break, mostly because I was 20 min late, but I still missed the 10 min I should have taken. So I left for home at 2:50, 40 min early for skipping my lunch and break. I got home had three pieces of old left over pizza which sat on my counter all night, then went to keep my roommate company at his work, just a few blocks from our apartment. That was fun, I saw a few people I hadn't seen in a while.

While I was there, his boss, Dave, was answering the phone, and I noticed how he talked to his clients, I need to be more like him in that area. He's a Christian too, and it's so cool to see how he handles the wacko calls IT people get. I realized I have plenty of time to better my self, and to keep on trying. I just want to serve, but I surely don't when I get the chance.

So after that I went home for about 20 min and read the newspaper, then I went off to my Young Adults group. I really like that group, I'm always stretched a little bit, but recently it's because I've been helping with the sound setup. I don't really feel like I fit in with the leadership or worship guys, but at the same time I know I have no real reason to make this a reason to stop trying. I really feel God doing something there, and I like that I'm a part of it, it's a good thing. After young adults (or 18/28 as we call it), we went to Red Robin, what a surprise, that was fun, talked to some girls and guys I've not talked to before, it was all good. Thankfully no one told the server my birthday was coming up, so that little embarrassing bit, where you stand on the chair, didn't happen. Although, now I would do it... yeah I would.

I've been thinking about what I want for my birthday, and here is what I've got so far:

- My Dad's guitar fixed, I really want to learn to play
- Money for my missions trip
- Money for tuition
- My car washed and vacuumed
- Maybe, MAYBE, a nice fruity drink of some sort...
- Concert tickets to see Third Day!
- Windows tinted on car
- Something really cool that I would never guess
- New jeans
- A new worship CD
- My brother comes to church with me!

That's all for now... I hate lists like these, I always feel selfish for some reason, but I guess a birthday is special, since It's your day to be special.