food for fish

I have been in counseling since November and I am now a firm believer in it. It is not just for those with depression, bad childhoods, or other such issues, it is for anyone who is truly willing to let God touch them deep, in the depths of their heart so that they may know who God says they are, and not what they say they are. I have learned so much about myself, about who God says we are, and now I am just beginning to understand that God truly does want us to be fully transformed, but we must continually release ourselves into His plans. Every one of us can have the freedom, boldness, and love to be as the great apostles. If we choose to endure the trials of our lives we will expierence His fullness in our lives. Here are some proverbs to get you thinking.

What can you do? Clichés are all around us! But whatever, it does not mean they are wrong to use. I try to avoid them, but when I am excited, they just happen. So, if this is all a bunch of pat Christianize I am sorry.

God is good, and His love cannot be fully understood, this is my conclusion. Not until perfection comes and we enter into His full glory will we truly understand the compassion of our Lord, the miracles of his spirit, and the love of our father. This God that we say is amazing, awesome, graceful, merciful, all knowing, is far greater than any of that, he is simple yet complex. The full understanding of His being, is so amazing to me, recently so much of my time is full of adoring who my God is, who he is to me, what he does for me, and what he is calling me to do, to be, and what I have done. He absolutely intrigues me; there is nothing more intriguing than just pondering who he is.

More and more I feel Him inside me, working in me, speaking to me, and I can just walk right with Him when I choose. That is the key to everything recently in my life. When I was young in the faith, I lived by experiencing Him, letting Him come to me. Now, He is teaching me to go to Him, instead of experiencing Him by "accident" I am seeking to experience Him. And as I step into ministering for Him, to others, learning to hear Him, and even stepping up and telling people what God puts on my heart, for them and for myself. It is exciting to serve the Lord, and I fully believe that all believers can minister. Yes, it takes some faith, it takes some risk taking, but the Lord is good, he will use all of us in mighty ways.

Continue to humble yourself, listen, and know that when your heart is racing and the same thought is repeating itself, speak. God will honor your faithfulness, and give you more. But, if you become overconfident and lean on your thoughts, and not his thoughts, He will humble you. So either way remain humbled, and always give thanks to God, for he is the one who provides the words of life.

September was the last time my car was washed, and last Thursday (the 3rd) was my birthday. A couple of people timed it just right and I got some checks in the mail on my birthday, just enough that I was able to get my car washed and detailed. And since I don’t think I have ever posted a picture of my car; here it is in the church parking lot. By the way, I’m 23 now… and yes, it does feel different, I’m in an odd numbered year, and odd numbered years make me feel older than even numbered, isn’t that strange?


Here is a before picture, back in January we had a one day ice storm, my poor car had mud frozen to it. I must have spent at least an hour breaking the ice off, and I am sure in the process I added a few scratches.

I'm hardly able to do anything these days, except when I listen to the only stable truth in my life, God himself. There is so much going on that makes me think I am inadequate, "just an intern", "just a computer guy", "just this or that"… But, it's all a lie. Christ wants us to be more than "just this or that" he says that we are saints, to be equipped, and he has commissioned us to do the work of spreading his word. It is our responsibility to let the world know about him, through serving, loving, telling, there is nothing else more important. Because he loves us so much, he has invited us to do the most important job. Of course, he can reveal himself, as he does around the world, but he uses us to make disciples of the nations. How humbling, how honoring, how mind-blowing that the creator of the universe uses us, and remember he made us only slightly lower than the angels. We give him love, and since we were created in his image, and we need love, therefore he must need love too. I'm hardly able to grasp it all, so I'll take it just one day at a time.